Bruce: God. Yeah, Let¡¦s thank God, shall we? For his blessings are raining down upon me. Wait! That¡¦s not rain!
Grace: Bruce, please don¡¦t do that, honey. You know that everything happens for a reason.
Bruce: That I don¡¦t need. That is a cliché. That is not helpful to me. A bird in one hand is worth two in the bush. I have no bird, I have no bush! God has taken my bird and my bush!
Grace: So God is picking on you? Is that what you¡¦re saying?
Bruce: No! He¡¦s ignoring me completely. [¡K¡K] I¡¦m a victim. God is a mean kid sits on an anthill with a magnifying glass, and I¡¦m the ant. He could fix my life in five minutes if he wanted to, but he¡¦d rather burn off my feelers and watch me squirm.
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Bruce: How do you make somebody love you without affecting free will?
God: Welcome to my world, son. You come up with an answer to that one, you let me know.
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God: Parting your soup is not a miracle, Bruce, it¡¦s a magic trick. A single mom who¡¦s working two jobs and still finds time to take her kid to soccer practice, that¡¦s a miracle. A teenager who says no to drugs and yes to an education, that¡¦s a miracle. People want me to do everything for them, and what they don¡¦t realize is, they have the power. You want to see the miracle, son? Be the miracle.
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