Kay: Who you got your money on, Dee?
Dee: Tough call, Kay.
〔……〕
Kay: We've got a winner here.
Dee: Oh, I know.
INS Agent: Sir… sir you can’t just…
Kay: Don't "sir" me, young man. You have no idea who you're dealing with. We're going to chat with our friend. You can hit the road. Keep on protecting us from the dangerous aliens.
---
NYPD Officer#1: Why is it that none of the officers saw either of these events?
Edwards: Sir, some of the officers are a little soggy around the midsection. I guess that's why they weren’t able keep up.
NYPD Officer#2: Edwards, If you were half the man I am…
Edwards: What are you talking about? I am half the man that you are.
---
Edwards: What's the catch?
Kay: The catch. The catch is you will sever every human contact. Nobody will ever know you exist anywhere. Ever. I'll give you to sunrise to think it over.
---
Jay: So who pays for all this?
Kay: We hold patents on a few gadgets we confiscated from our state visitors. Velcro, microwave ovens, liposuction. This is a fascinating little gadget. It'll replace CDs soon. |
K：D，你賭是誰？
D：K，這很難說。
〔……〕
K：答案揭曉。
D：喔，看得出來。
移民局探員：長官…長官你不能…
K：年輕人，別長官來長官去的，你不知道你面對的是什麼。我們要跟這些朋友聊聊天，你可以離開了，繼續保衛我們不受危險外國人／外星人的侵襲。
---
紐約警探1：為什麼其他的警探都沒看到你說的任何一件事。
愛德華：長官，他們有些人的肚子有些「中廣」，我猜這就是為什麼他們追不上我的原因。
紐約警探2：愛德華，你要是有我一半的男人味…
愛德華：你在說什麼？我的個子真的是你的一半呀。
---
愛德華：缺點是什麼？
K：缺點是你必須切斷所有的人際關係，沒有人知道你曾經存在，永遠如此，我給你到日出的時間考慮看看。
---
J：這些經費都從哪來？
K：我們握有一些專利，是從外星訪客那沒收的玩意兒：魔鬼沾、微波爐、抽脂手術。這個小東西超有趣的，它將會取代CD。 |
