Ruby: Naming your dog after him? It’s a little disrespectful.
Calvin: No, it’s a gesture.
Ruby: Yeah, an aggressive gesture. Think about it. You’re a novelist. You think this guy’s the greatest. So you name your dog after him to cut him down to size. This way, you can put him on a leash . . . and yell “Bad Scotty” . . . and feel all superior because you pee inside.
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Harry: What did you do? Hire some actress?Craigslist? This isn’t funny.
Calvin: I told you, she just appeared.
Harry: You’re a writer, not Ricky Jay.
Calvin: I know that.
Harry: There’s gotta be some logical explanation.
Calvin: Love isn’t logical.
Harry: No, but you know what is? Physics. Or metaphysics. People don’t appear out of thin air.
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Ruby: I’m sorry I wasn’t acting like the platonic ideal of your girlfriend. Jesus, you can be such a fucking prude.
Calvin: Because I don’t want you skinny-dipping with men?
Ruby: Because you don’t want me doing anything!